Building a Happy Marriage - Final Thoughts

If you want your marriage to keep getting better and better, then start right now.

Become a student of your man. There is no more enjoyable class.

Become proficient in making the meals he likes best. The way to a man's heart has always been through his stomach. Plan your menus around his favorites. Any future mother-in-law would be flattered to give you some of her recipes.

Write him love letters. It may be a quick email to his work address, or five pages of handwritten script. No matter your skill with a pen, he will read your sincere words of love and admiration over and over.

Enter his world once in a while. And learn to sense when he wants to be alone there. He will have fun if you join him for a tractor ride, but he cherishes his hours of solitude out in the fields. He will enjoy trying to explain his favorite sports game to you, but let him watch the game with "just the guys" once in a while, too. Whether it's his hobby or trade, whether it's mechanics or art, he will feel special if you ask for the honor of watching him as he works. Learn to anticipate his needs and hand him the tool he's looking for (this sometimes involves learning the difference between a pipe wrench and a socket). And learn when he'd rather you do your own thing.

Examine your pre-conceived notions about marriage. Observe other couples and learn from them--what you do and what you don't want your marriage to be like. Mentally plan and prepare to be the best, most loving wife possible. When you are married, you'll be glad you aimed high--because you won't be a better wife than you planned on being.

He is the head of your household, and God placed him in authority over you. Learn when he wants you to give advice, and when he desperately needs someone to believe in his plan. Learn to be silent even when you disagree. Learn to just squeeze his hand or distract him with a kiss when he might be saying unkind words to someone else. There are times when you will need to speak up, humbly. Practice being a submissive wife so he will hear you at those times.

Show him your love. In public, and in private. For now this may be just a squeeze of his hand or a whispered word. But when you are married, let it be your goal to make him so addicted to you that he will never look anywhere else. Make yourself desireable to him. Give him all the love you have, and then some. It has often been said that you should never go to bed angry; neither should you let your husband go to sleep still hungry.

Show others that you love him. Never will your man stand so tall as when the world can see that his wife respects him. Make it obvious, in word and in manner, to strangers and to your closest friends, that you count it the greatest privilege in the world to be married to your husband.

Be joyful. Never stop smiling, with a smile he knows is just for him, a smile made extra brigh because he is there. When you are married and he comes home from work tired and stressed, your loving smile will be the most welcome sight he has seen all day. Always be sure to touch up your makeup and hair just before he is due home--maybe even a spritz of his favorite perfume. Run to him with a kiss. And don't tell him about the overflowing toilet, the overdue bills, or anything else unpleasant until he has had a chance to eat a good dinner and relax in his favorite chair.

Thank him. For loving you, for being your man, for taking out the trash, for providing the money for food and clothing, for working so hard, for helping you make the bed, for kissing you, for being the man you love so much. And thank God for him, when he is there to hear, and every other moment of the day when he is out working hard for you and of the night when he is sleeping right beside you.

- by Gretchen Acheson