Our Courtship Story
by Shannon Krabill
It all started the summer of 2001. But I sure didn’t know then! A close friend of mine, Heidi Headings, moved from Oregon to Iowa the summer of 2000. While living in Oregon, Heidi had a summer job of driving combine for the grass-seed harvest and planned to return there for her summer job. I was looking for a summer job and she suggested going to Oregon with her. I told my parents about it but didn’t really think anything would come of it. So I was very surprised when Mom and Dad felt like it would be a good experience and said I could go! So out we flew.
It was a growing experience as I depended on GOD for courage to live in a new community for 7 weeks. We had a great time and had lots of fun with the rest of the crew. One young man that we all enjoyed having around was Konrad Krabill. His fun-loving, enthusiastic personality and mature GODly spirit was a joy to be around. I really enjoyed being with him, but being close friends with a young man back home, I was not wanting anything more than friendship and felt comfortable with him as he treated us girls with respect and sincere friendship. So thinking that was that, I was surprised that I really missed him when I went back home.
Trying to concentrate on school, I threw myself into all the activities of being a senior. Before long, graduation had come and gone and I decided that I would go to Oregon once more. Summer began and soon, I had to admit to myself, that no matter how hard I tried to deny it, I was attracted to Konrad. Not knowing what else to do, I determined to not let anyone know, which meant I had to deny my feelings many times as I wanted to be with him, but knew I shouldn’t. Over and over GOD reminded me that HE wanted my heart and for me to trust that His will is always best even if it isn’t what I think I want. That summer was a turning point in my life as I began trusting Him with everything. It was often difficult, as I had to deny myself, but it was better for me as I learned self-control. Looking back, I am so grateful for guarding myself against showing him that I liked him, even though it seemed that my heart was telling me to. Soon work was done and in the middle of August, it was time to head home.
The night before I left, Konrad and I happened to be alone and he asked if we could talk. In that conversation, he said how much he appreciated getting to know me and was wondering if I would pray about starting a relationship. I was totally shocked and delighted as I realized that he liked me too!!! I told him that I had been praying about it and he was also delighted! When I got home I told my parents about it and we took it to the LORD in prayer. That fall the LORD led me to stay at home and home-school four of my younger siblings. Konrad and I emailed back and forth some, but as "just friends" we decided to keep it limited. That January we attended a 6-week Bible School (BMA), which we had signed up for the year before. GOD had planned that we would be in the same classes and enabled us to make new friends and focus on learning about HIM and still get to know each other even better.
By this time I had received peace from GOD about Konrad being the one for me. But not knowing when HIS will would unfold, I kept it to myself. At the end of Bible School we had a one-week choir tour, which Konrad and I had both signed up for. My family came out to hear one of our programs and Konrad asked to meet with them in private. When I said good-bye to my parents later, I was even more curious when they didn’t mention anything about the meeting. That night I was wide-awake, wondering what the result had been. Knowing HE would take care of it, I gave it to the LORD, in faith that no matter what would happen, it would be for my benefit. The next day Konrad asked if I would go to a restaurant with him and having my parent’s blessing, I was thrilled to agree. So the evening of February 21, he told me that he had asked my parent’s for permission to start a courtship and now was presenting it to me. Konrad did not pressure me, but was honest about the seriousness of the decision. He said he took courting very seriously and wanted to marry the first girl he courted. Having GOD’s peace in my heart, I answered him with a delighted yes!
The next morning I returned home and we continued our courtship with phone-calls, emails, and good-old snail-mail letters. He visited as his quartet (a cappella harmony quartet) allowed, and came out the end of May to visit my family. It was wonderful to have him here and learn to know my family better. Our courtship has been a very good time of talking, sharing, and becoming kindred spirits. Konrad is such an encouragement and points me to GOD in so many ways. Thus I felt that my relationship with GOD is able to grow instead of suffer as I become closer with Konrad.
It‘s also been a time of learning patience and submission, as I have to get off the phone when I didn’t want to and "little" things like that. Being submissive to my parents has not always been easy when I’m selfish, but all the effort has been far worth it as I have realized that relating positively to my Dad has laid a good foundation for being a submissive wife. Konrad has observed that my good relationship with my parents has helped our relationship and I appreciate his respect for authority and know that it has helped build trust. Trust is very important, especially when considering marriage. (Who wants to live with someone they can’t trust 100%?) Being able to trust Konrad with everything has made our friendship so enjoyable. It began with the way he treated me from the start, in purity and as a sister in Christ, and he helped build it even more during our courtship with the way he respected my parents and I. Trusting each other is being able to be open and honest...always, which is true freedom.
Another factor that has strengthened our relationship is the "homework", we have done. By homework, I mean talking to family and friends about the other. He even talked to my schoolteachers and volleyball coach just asking how I act in different situations and what they have observed being with me. I was also able to do homework on him and found it to be a good experience, learning more about him and finding that other people also appreciated the wonderful person I was. The point of all this, was to involve others, to get others’ opinions and advice so we would not be relying on our own feelings. Something that is very important in courtship is purity. (Of course!) I had heard that a hundred times but it took a new meaning on for me.
This summer I returned to Oregon to work and had a wonderful time being with Konrad and his family...but I found out that being very in love and often together, presented a new tide of temptations. We decided to save our first kiss for our wedding day, but realized that purity is much more than standards but a direction of the mind. Sometimes we had to walk away from certain situations, even when our heart was fighting against us. GOD provided grace and strength and has helped us save our passion. HE wants us to realize that passion is good but to be kept for His time. Some things that help are coming before the LORD in prayer continually, and having friends that keep us accountable. For we know that by practicing patience, we will reap great rewards.
Oh and remember I said he came out to visit the end of May? Yes well that was a wonderful time but there is more to it. On June 7, 2003 Konrad, my sweetheart and best friend, asked me to marry him and with peace overflowing in my heart and tears in my eyes, I said YES!!!!!
Konrad and Shannon were married on November 8th 2003!